Marriage Blog
Does the Bible Allow Divorce for Adultery? (Matthew 19:9 Explained)
Part of our guide: Healing After Infidelity
When a husband cheats, many Christian wives ask the same thing: Am I allowed to divorce him? And if I stay, am I foolish? Scripture speaks to both questions, and it gives more freedom and more hope than many women expect.
What Jesus said
"And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery."Matthew 19:9 (KJV)
The Greek word often translated "fornication" or "sexual immorality" is porneia, a broad word for sexual sin. Jesus named it as an exception: divorce in that case is not sin for the betrayed spouse.
Permitted is not commanded
In the same conversation, Jesus explained that Moses allowed divorce "because of the hardness of your hearts" (Matthew 19:8). Divorce after adultery is permitted. It is never required. Many believers choose to forgive and rebuild when there is true repentance, and that is just as biblical.
Other passages to know
- Malachi 2:16. God's heart grieves over broken covenants.
- 1 Corinthians 7:10-15. Paul encourages reconciliation and addresses an unbelieving spouse who leaves.
- Hosea. A prophet pursues an unfaithful wife as a picture of God's covenant love.
Christians and churches differ on how they apply these passages. Talk with your pastor about how your church understands them.
Questions to pray through
- Has the affair truly ended?
- Is my husband showing repentance, or only regret?
- Am I and my children safe?
- What is God saying to me when I quiet the other voices?
- Have I sought godly counsel from people who care about both me and my marriage?
For more help, read Should I Stay After He Cheated?.
A word about abuse
Matthew 19 is about adultery. If you are facing abuse, threats or control, that is a safety issue first. God does not ask you to remain in danger. Read When Standing Isn't Safe.
Whatever you choose, you are not alone
Terrie Beeman walks with women on both paths with prayer and biblical wisdom. If you are leaning toward fighting for your marriage, start with our healing after infidelity guide.